The Uncommon Communicator

E100 - Gratitude and Growth: The Story of the Uncommon Communicator

• James Gable • Season 2 • Episode 100

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Brace yourself for a journey of reflections, insights, and gratitude as we celebrate our 100th episode of the Uncommon Communicator Podcast. This isn't just an episode; it's a milestone that marks our collective growth in the world of communication. We've learned to recognize when communication occurs, to take charge of conversations, and to steer dialogues towards mutual understanding. Gratitude is in the air  Let's not forget our incredible guests who brought their unique perspectives to our podcast. 

Please connect with them:
Jesse Hernandez: E13 and E97
Joanna Ostrander : E14 and 15
Dan Fauchier : E62
Felipe Engineer Manriquez : E66
William Bullock : E74
Jennifer Lacy : E76
Greg Gazin : E82 and E84
Big Ed Gable : E88
Keith Bailey : E93
Adam Hoots: E95
Rich Hopkins : E99

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Website : theuncommoncommunicator.com

The Uncommon Communicator :

You want to talk right down to us and elane with everybody here can easily understand what we got here is a failure to communicate. Welcome to the Uncommon Communicator Podcast, where we are here to bring enlightenment to the topic of communication. Welcome today, especially to episode 100. That's correct. 99 other times we have said those words. Welcome to the Uncommon Communicator Podcast, very similar to that live from New York. It's one of those things that really are the hallmark of how we start our podcast.

The Uncommon Communicator :

Episode 100 brings about a time of reflection. It also brings about a time of gratitude and thanks. The timing of this just happens to be right around the holiday of Thanksgiving in the United States. I will be going through a couple of things that I'm really thankful for, but first off, I want to celebrate 100 episodes. We have hit six continents, 44 countries, 459 cities. I'm honored, I am thankful for and humbled by the growth of this podcast has brought, both across the world and also to myself as well, feeling that you might be making an impact somewhere across the world in some little niche. All I was looking for was to reach one person. In some cases, that person was right here. It was myself Seeing that growth across all of these countries, all of these cities, has really been inspiring to me to continue. And, most of all, even if I was the only one who grew from this and there's a very good chance that that might even be the case in some episodes but I'm okay with that, because I'm the person that grew from sharing and I want to share that experience with you.

The Uncommon Communicator :

Now, hitting this episode 100, a little bit of a reminder what is an uncommon communicator? What we started out with is the uncommon communicator is the individual that has the enlightenment to recognize, in any situation, whether or not communication has occurred. Now, this has been another hallmark of our podcast Is the idea of enlightenment. It's really knowing. Have you ever been around those people who just don't realize that there's no conversation going on here? Well, it's about recognizing it, but first you got to have that enlightenment. The Incommon communicator also takes ownership of the conversation and he or she possesses the skills to navigate and facilitate two very important words the conversation to a mutual understanding. Hopefully that's exactly what we've done for 99 other episodes and maybe this is the 100th episode where we're helping you gain the skills to navigate and facilitate conversations. The whole goal is a mutual understanding. You don't have to come to a mutual agreement every time, but if you can mutually understand each other and each other's goals and come to that agreement, then you are a much better communicator than you were when you started.

The Uncommon Communicator :

Now, first off, it is that Thanksgiving time season here in the United States. What am I grateful for? First off, those around me that have inspired me to this point. Those are folks on LinkedIn. Those are folks that I've ran into in person, who have inspired me to get this out there to talk about communication. You would think that communication is easy to find information about and there is, and that's part of the problem. It is definitely a huge genre but we seem to fail at it a lot, because it is one of the most challenging things that we do. And here at the Incommon communicator, we also talk about having not the keys to your success, but really the combination lock, and that's one of the things that really drive being an uncommon communicator is knowing what other people's combinations are required for you to be able to unlock that communication with those individuals. But I'm inspired by those around me and thank you for those that have inspired me to this point.

The Uncommon Communicator :

First off, my family. They have really encouraged and supported me all the time that I have spent building this hobby we'll call it, but really a passion of mine to share these tips on communication. I've grown from it, but they've allowed me the time to do this and have encouraged me to do it. So my family. I'm grateful for my family. I'm also thankful and grateful for my co-host, brandon Thompson. He's currently not working together, but his impact on this show will carry on. My guests there will be names on the show. Now it's an all pop every guest that we've had on because that's a new format that we've turned to on this show. I have grown from every one of them that I've met, with the connections that I've meant. I'll have their names and their contact information on the show notes.

The Uncommon Communicator :

But that is where I have felt the most growth was not just in the study and the preparation that we've put into this podcast, but also in getting to know and making connections with people who are communicators. People are making an impact in this world. I have gathered from them their wisdom and finally, that says where I end up also is the personal growth that I've achieved. Both preparing and presenting. All of these things have really developed in me skills that I didn't know that I have, and that's one of the keys, really, of learning and being a self developer and a learner is, yes, you can listen to it. Next, you can write it down, but you get to the other steps of preparing and teaching and sharing. All of those things will improve who you are and how you communicate and how you are in anything that you're looking to improve on, and also really meeting some of the greatest individuals in this industry. I want to, I'm grateful for that growth that I've achieved from that. So very grateful, very thankful this time of the year Now, one of the UC moments it's really another hallmark of our podcast is the UC moment, the uncommon communicator moment, a summation, and where we are driven on this is Anytime you're in a presentation, maybe sometimes for an hour, hour and a half, maybe an all-day presentation what are you really going to walk away with?

The Uncommon Communicator :

Are you going to walk away with the whole set of encyclopedian knowledge that you're walking away from this presentation with? No, if you're lucky, and at best you're going to walk away with one thing, two things maybe at the most. So what I like to do at the end of all of our podcasts is, to sum them up, have the uncommon communicator moment. I've even asked us in meetings before meetings that maybe weren't all that well presented, that were a little bit scattered I said, you know, I raised my hand and I said, hey, what is one thing, what's the most important thing that we should walk away with? Then I've had some of the presenters really scratch their head because they hadn't put the time in to what is the most important thing that you can leave here with. And I think that's one of the most important things we need as communicators is to know that, at the end of the day, people are going to walk away with one thing. And what is that? Because I'll guarantee you and I've seen this they don't always walk away with what you think is the most important thing, unless you're clear on it.

The Uncommon Communicator :

So the UC moment is all about summation, finding out what that moment is that people can walk away with, maybe in a word, in a sentence. We've been guilty of it and you can go back and check them where they were too long, our summation was too long of it and we created new ideas. It's the idea is what are we walking away with? So I grabbed six of them out of all of our episodes, for you today on this Thanksgiving week, to think about, to maybe put into play. Let's jump into it.

The Uncommon Communicator :

First one you know we started with a book by Chris Voss called Never Split the Difference, and that was the start of our podcast, because that book and how we broke down his negotiation skills were all things that really had to do with communication, had to do with listening. Now, episode one negotiation is nothing more than communication with results. That was episode one. That was our first summation of what is negotiation. So remember that. Do you want communication that has results? Yes, is the answer to that every single time and really going through, if you look at the first nine episodes as we dive into that book, there's labels, there's mirrors, there's the black swan All of these things were helping us in being a good negotiator, which also is communicating with results. So that was really really, really a really fun UC moment. That was the first one that we really created in this podcast, jumping to episode 14 with Joanna Ostrander. Now, joanna is by far the most popular podcast that we had, so many downloads and so much response that we had from that episode.

The Uncommon Communicator :

Joanna is a just a genuinely nice, smart individual and she's in music therapy and she's out really changing people's lives People who may have cognitive learning disorders, cognitive issues. She uses music to help them communicate and it was just really a great episode that we have and I'll put a link to that in the show notes as well. You need to check out Joanna Ostrander. We did two part it, which is something we're not going to do anymore, but we split it up and that first one was fantastic. The second one was just as good but didn't get as much results.

The Uncommon Communicator :

But in this first one, this is what Joanna said. She said, whatever net impact she wants to have, she wants it to be a positive one. And we talked about net impact because we're all making impacts all the time Positive, negative. She wants a positive one, which is such a humbling way for her to say this, because she is making a huge impact. With in my mind and what I see from her world, there's not that negative portion of it, but she's making a great positive impact on the world. She also added these words finding your niche and accomplishing your task, and that's one of those things when you look at big, grandiose ideas they don't have to be huge. Find your niche, find the one thing, find it and accomplish it. If you're doing that, you're being successful and you're being a successful communicator.

The Uncommon Communicator :

In episode 62, we had Dan Fuchet and one of his. We had him give his summation of it. His UC moment was this show some humanity for crying out loud. Dan, we thank you for those words. They were a little bit of a shock. We're like, wow, that is fantastic. Show humanity for crying out loud, like with the passion. That is one of the things that we need to have in all of our communications is a sense of humanity. I think if we do that alone, there's going to be a level of peace and understanding when you realize that we are all humans, we all have a level of humanity. So show some humanity for crying out loud.

The Uncommon Communicator :

Episode 74 had William Bullock on. Now, william, I had met online through LinkedIn connected with him. He is a former hostage negotiator with the UK police and is just a fun, interesting guy and you have to check out that episode. He really tells a story about this and the UC moment was this empathy can disarm. Now, what he shared was this brilliant story, absolutely brilliant story of where he used empathy and it literally had a guy drop a knife in this very tense, bloody hostage negotiation, but empathy alone caused this guy to drop that knife. It was jaw dropping. It's amazing to hear that story, but the idea of using empathy to disarm was amazing.

The Uncommon Communicator :

The next one is episode 75, decision Fatigue. It's basically take steps to reduce your decision load. Seems like a UC moment. That seems easy, right? I shared this one because for this one, I was actually able to, prior to and after that episode, apply the principles that we talk about and that we studied. I was able to take it into work and then use the idea of well, what would you think? And where I used an opportunity to take my decision load?

The Uncommon Communicator :

Because, as a superintendent, we are making hundreds and hundreds, maybe a thousand decisions every single day. That creates a cognitive load, a decision load, and sometimes you get to the point of this decision load and you're running out of juice. You may not be making the best decisions because you are fatigued. It happens it's a physical muscle, but I was able to apply it and reduce my decision load on the project and a couple two things come out of that. One is you have to be able to reduce your decision load. But in doing it this is how I do it. Somebody comes to me with a problem and I ask them well, what do you think we should do? And then they give you the answer they already had it A lot of times. They do, but they want you to make it for them. They give that decision, you agree with them, they go out and then do it. Now, when they do that, not only do they now own that decision, but you have encouraged them to make that decision and also you've reduced your cognitive load. It's a win-win for everybody. So decision fatigue is take steps to reduce your decision load. That alone has helped me really improve my decision making and my project managing and my construction leading, because you want to involve and engage and collaborate.

The Uncommon Communicator :

The last one I want to share is episode 97 with Jesse Hernandez. At the end of this episode he says share your story with all the dirty details. Now Jesse has called me a vulnerability. Oh, how did he word that I'm basically sitting on the sidelines? I'm a vulnerability amateur. Those aren't the words that he used, but the idea is share your stories, get the dirty details out there, because what Jesse has done in sharing his stories has impacted other people's lives and we have to know these stories and share these stories so that people can grow and learn from our mistakes. That's what I learned the most from Jesse in that episode is vulnerability isn't always just about sharing feelings, because that's the part that probably worries me the most Diving into feelings that I don't even know that I have yet. I'm a little worried about that. But if I'm just sharing the stupid things that I do and it's helping you to improve, I'll start at that level of vulnerability.

The Uncommon Communicator :

So those are six UC moments that really stood out for me and wanting to share them in this time of Thanksgiving, in this time of gratefulness for every one of our listeners. We've got listeners in the UK. We have listeners Our number two listener nation is Portugal and we want to thank Portugal, australia, the United States, canada. We have people all over the world that are listening in and growing their communication, that are finding enlightenment and they're finding ownership to their conversations and to their communications. So the UC moment for today, for this episode, is really take some time this year to write down your gratitudes, your thanks, and you'll be surprised at where it brings you. That's all I got for today. See you, bye, vreastwoodcom.