Great Speaking Starts When You Stop Making It About You

Your message can be brilliant and still miss the room. That’s the tension we dig into with Bob Hooey, a longtime Toastmaster, international professional speaker, and the guy clients nicknamed “The Idea Man.” We talk about what actually changes when you present across cultures, why a joke that kills at home can die overseas, and how doing a little research on local norms, references, and audience expectations can save you from dead silence.

We also get practical about audience-first communication and public speaking skills. Bob shares how he preps by talking with real attendees before he ever steps on stage, how a service mindset makes you calmer and more effective, and why “talking with people” beats “talking to people” every time. Along the way, we swap coaching stories about frozen moments, breathing, slowing down, and helping people perform under pressure, plus leadership lessons from asking better questions instead of always being the fixer.

Then we go into speaker branding, handling feedback without spiraling, and the business side of communication: creating books, training, and programs that extend your value beyond a single talk. Bob also previews “Skills Pay,” a project focused on turning Toastmasters and presentation skills into real-world opportunities. If you want stronger leadership communication, better audience connection, and smarter preparation, you’ll get plenty to steal here. Subscribe, share this with a friend who presents for work, and leave a review so more people can find the show.

You can contact Bob through LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/canadianideamanbobhooey/

YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@ideamanbob

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Transcript

Welcome And Guest Introduction

SPEAKER_03 0:01

Welcome to the Uncommon Communicator Podcast. I am your host, Dan Cable, and this is where we bring enlightenment to the topic of communication. Are you ready to take ownership of your conversations? Are you looking to possess the skills to navigate and facilitate conversations to a mutual understanding? Then grab your growth mindset and let's go. Good morning, everybody, and welcome to the Uncommon Communicator. It is my pleasure today to have with me Bob, the idea manhui. Bob, I have to let you uh tell us a little bit about yourself.

SPEAKER_00 0:33

Well, thanks, James, for having me. I am coming to you today from the frozen tundra of northern Alberta. And I say that because we still have winter here. We just had five inches of snow three days ago. Uh, and it's minus 10 out there right now. So I keep thinking this is supposed to be spring, but it's not yet. So um I live in a little town called Eggermont. Uh I travel the world from here. I have been a professional speaker now for uh close to 30-some years. I I started my my professional speaking uh about four years into my Toastmaster journey. And I've been having fun traveling the world, encouraging people, challenging them to get out of their comfort zones, because that's the only time you learn is when you get outside of your comfort zone. That's at least for me. It's when I've when I've uh taken the step and found out there was no nets, so then I learned to fly, kind of thing. But uh it's it's been a fun adventure. It's been fun so far. I've met some amazing people over the last 35 years in Toastmasters, and I'm I just I just enjoy doing this.

Speaking Across Cultures Without Missteps

SPEAKER_03 1:44

Wow, it's amazing when you get paid to do what you enjoy to do, isn't that right? Yeah, well, that's uh I'd love to hear more about your international travels too, because I think that is something that uh and we had a little bit of discussion with another guest where uh they travel internationally as well, too. There's cultural differences, like there's challenges not only just in communication, but uh even in presenting your message. So have you got some kind of uh really fun story to tell about an international trip?

SPEAKER_00 2:14

Oh, lots of them actually, but we'll we'll pick one. Um one one thing I'd suggest to people if you want to travel international. Let me take a look. There's there's a I'm looking up because that's more of one of my one of my bookshelves. I have a book called Kiss, Bow, or Shake Hands. That's just up here. And it talks about all the different cultures, not from every single country, but from a lot of them. Uh and and you need to you need to be conscious of some of this because you can uh being a North American, we do certain things that we don't even think about, like like that would get you in trouble in some countries. Oh yeah. Or that would get you in trouble in some countries, you know, because it's it has negative connotations. But uh, I was speaking in Iran. I was engaged to go over initially for a two-day strategic management seminar. And the guy hired me or somehow was able to get me into the country. Wasn't as easy as some people would think. And then while I was there, he sold me to a bunch of other ones. But I was sharing uh a story, and and he was doing the translation, he was doing a simultaneous translation, which means word, word, word, word, word, word, which is different than interpreting. And I told a story that in North America always gets at least a giggle, at least dead silence, nothing, absolutely nothing. And so I talked to him afterwards, and I said, What happened? He said, I don't know. And I so I explained the story to him. He said, Well, that's funny. We did the we did a an event on the Isle of Keith. They have an open university, and it's one of the ones in actually in the Hermo Strait in that area where they're having all the troubles right now. And uh so I told the same story, and the students were laughing and they were lying on the ground, you know, rolling on the ground the whole bit because he got funny. He got the joke. But there's one of the little secrets. If you humor doesn't always transfer well. So if you if you're going to another country and you want to share something, uh make sure the references work too. Check the humor with the person you're talking to, check their references. Uh, for example, uh, if you're talking to a younger group in another country, they they may not know the same music that we do. They may not know some of the same icons that we do. So you're giving examples and they're going, I don't know. I don't get it. Who's this person? And and you get dead air instead of engagement. And that's where the work comes. You do your homework before you leave home. I do that even when I'm traveling uh for fun. Like uh just before I come down to Denver, I'm actually gonna spend my birthday in Milan. And uh then we're then we're going over to Genoa and we're gonna take an eight-day cruise around the around the you know the Mediterranean. But I'm still checking out stuff before I go. Like, for example, I found out that the lat Da Vinci's Last Supper is in Milan. So I'm gonna go see that. You know, we're gonna take a side trip to Florence at the end of the trip because Michelangelo's David is there. And Michelangelo is somebody that I really admire. He's like, even though he's been gone for centuries, he's one of my heroes because of what he did with his life. And at 87, he said, I'm still learning. And at 77, I'm going, me too.

SPEAKER_03 5:34

Well, what you said though is in regards to traveling internationally, doesn't that fit for just communicate or not communication, but but public speaking in general is knowing your audience. So knowing the audience, whether you know them uh as autoworkers or whoever you're speaking to, you go to another country, it's just about knowing the audience. Like what are the tricks do you do in really getting to know your audience before you present?

Do Your Homework On The Audience

SPEAKER_00 6:00

Well, I I talk to people. And the nice thing about it is with the advent of Zoom, which I really got into using during COVID. I mean, I I had used Zoom primarily when I was, for example, when I was a reaching advisor to talk to my my district team because I got comfortable with it. But uh, I'll do that. I get on and do something like this, and I'll talk to people who are gonna be in the audience. Because I used to do that when I first started professionally speaking, I'd say, I want to talk to five people that are gonna be in the audience that are representative of your company. And I'd get on the phone with them, I'd email them and I'd get on the phone with them because what the CEO wants who hires you is different than what the people who are gonna show up in the seats want. And I want to make sure both of them are happy. But do the same thing when you're traveling. Get online, do some research about the the country, the town, the city you're gonna be in, and talk to people. You'll be amazed what people will tell you if you just ask them questions. You know, what's happening in your area? Why are what's your area famous for? What are the challenges that just like when you're talking to clients, like you probably do with your clients, you know, what are the challenges that your company is facing right now? Then I can help you. Same thing when you're coming in. You're not coming in as the North American guru of motivation and whatever. You're coming in as as Bob who would just say, How can I help? Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 7:18

I think that's something I've heard from a lot of uh professional speakers, which was really a turn. Like learning that was uh hearing it and learning it was more difficult than I thought, which is truly like how are you serving your audience? You know, a lot of just kind of what you just represented. I think there's even people that sit in the audience thinking, all right, Bob Huey, entertain me. Uh and then you really realize that you're there 100% to serve your your audience. And that's a different perspective. Is that is that a mindset you've had for a long time?

SPEAKER_00 7:51

Yeah, it it's something I actually learned in Toastmasters. And when I finally got it, that it's not about me. I mean, it's about me in the sense of my experiences and examples, and and I use myself as here's what I've learned. Like I'm gonna do that in Denver. I'm gonna I'm gonna share some of the things I've learned in 35 years that hopefully will be helpful to my fellow Toastmasters, but it's not about me in the sense of me being the hero. Once I realized it was about the audience, I started having more fun. I started smiling more. I'm serious. You you mentioned my smile. I I have people compliment me on my smile. Or they come up and say, you know, I had a lady come up to me in Cancun. She said, You look like you're having fun up there. And I said, Well, let's think it's December. I'm not at home in the cold, you know. I'm I'm wearing makeup because we're doing a three-camera shoot. I'm being paid to be here. Yeah, I'm having fun.

SPEAKER_03 8:45

I had a similar situation. We were in the Bahamas for the one of the conventions, and there was a guy who's working the boat uh area or something, like handing out vows or something. He's like, Hey, you keep doing that, man. And I'm like, what? And I'm just out, you know, I'm we're off on some off hours, and I was just smiling. And you don't realize how far uh that truly does get to a long way.

SPEAKER_00 9:10

But my smile has opened up so many conversations with people over the years in traveling. I mean, people are, you know, I mean, some people just don't want to be bothered, which is fine. But a lot of times you smile at them, they were smile back. I smile, I smile at kids. I mean, when you know, and then then then their parents start talking to you, and it it makes the time go well. And and you meet you meet some interesting people. I uh we just did a cruise last last month in the Caribbean. We're Canadians, so in February, January, February, we do what the smart Canadians do. We go south to talk. You all leave, right? Don't you? We all leave and go to the south and go to the Caribbean. And so there was a guy that I'd seen walking around the the ship, you know, um, you know, dark tan, white hair, perfectly quaffed, wearing, you know, tailored jackets and just looking like you know, multi-millionaire kind of guy. And then I saw him and his wife one night. We went for dinner, a special dinner, and we got talking. His name is Rich. He's 91 years old. And he said, I decided a number of years ago that I was going to enjoy my life and I was going to be positive in every day. And when he went to come over to say goodbye, he said, My name is Rich. I'm Rich and Friends. And he left. That was that was an experience.

SPEAKER_03 10:30

Wow. So you said something, uh, you're talking about getting out of comfort zones. And I think that's something that uh, and you said for me, I like how you like said, Hey, it's just my opinion. I science is saying this for sure. So I'll confirm that what you've done uh has certainly the one of the almost only paths to uh really true growth is getting out of that comfort zone. I think Toastmasters gives people an opportunity uh to do that. But do you have any examples where because I know you coach people where you've helped somebody get out of that comfort zone and have really seen just the the fantastic work that can happen from that?

SPEAKER_00 11:08

Well, I I give you I'll give you one example. Uh we had a member of of our club who was a lawyer, and he had uh uh I'm not sure what it was, it was cervipalsy or something like that. So he really had a challenge speaking. And when he got nervous, it was even worse. And so we we taught him to breathe, to take his time, to to to really breathe, because when he took his time and slowed down, then people can understand him. You know, and I said, Well, you know, you you do this when you're doing your stuff at court. And he said, Yeah, that's different because I know what I'm doing. I said, You can do that here too. You just have to think in your head, stop, and breathe, and then speak out. And and we watched him relax, and all of a sudden we could understand him. And that that was amazing. Or another time I was teaching a course because I used to do that was in Vancouver. I used to teach teach a course that was uh they had five days with me of 60 days on on presentation skills, and a lot of them were English as second language. And there was a lady who was there, and I had them, I had them off speaking, because that's part of because I tell them, you're you're gonna learn this by doing this. And she got up and she stuck. And we've all seen that happen. And she stuck in the class, and the class had said, okay, let her sit down. And I said, No, I I got up, I stood beside her, I put my arm on her shoulder, and I said, No, just breathe, relax. You know you can do this, and okay, try it again. And she was fine, you know, because I'd I'd seen that. I I saw that at a at a district contest in Prince George. We had a a competitor that stuck. He got about two minutes in and stuck. He couldn't remember where he was. He just and I saw me and and a whole bunch of other people that were competitors coaching the guy from this on the bottom of the stage, going, relax, just back up, because he he backed up, tried it again, tried that three times, just relax, relax, and finally he moved through. He didn't win, but it was an amazing lesson for all of us in terms of we pulled for him so that he can finish his speech and walk away a winner. Yeah, regardless of what the you know the judges say.

SPEAKER_03 13:30

There's so many things tied to public speaking that have to do with life, leadership, uh really being able to communicate, being able to just be a better human. Because to the point you just drew on, where you know you you're in the maybe the biggest fear of your life, frozen. And it you have to truly understand that that everybody in the audience, and you're talking your competition in a contest, is they're frozen and you're rooting for them. Like that's the power of being on stage, but it's the power of the audience. There's so much that's involved in that, and then you can tie that to really any room, like not just presenting to you know, whoever you're presenting to. You're in the boardroom, you're in the office. You know, people when you pause and hesitate like that, they're rooting for you.

Selling By Serving And Adding Value

SPEAKER_00 14:16

Yeah. Well, and and it it carries you a long way. I mentioned to you before we were starting, and I had the one little book that made me$105,000. I did a uh I had a client here in Canada that was the largest uh furniture retailer and appliance retailer in Canada, all stores all across Canada, 6,500 employees. And for about five years, they put me in different spots to help write the write a book for them called The Brick Way, and I coached all their VPs and whatever. And uh so we started an online training program called Secret Selling Tips, and their president called me and said, Bob, I want you to book a flight and come to Seattle or to uh Chicago. And I said, Why? He said, There's 10 of us that get together three times a year and share best best ideas, and you're my best idea this year. So I went, okay, so and he said, I'm gonna get you 15 minutes on the agenda, you can tell them about the secret selling tips. And so I I literally spent three days creating this little book. I'll show it to you. I may talk about that on the Sunday program, but I created this little book and I took it with me. And at the end of my 15-minute presentation, I said to these guys who are they're the presidents and and uh the managing people of these 10 big retail stores in in the states. If I mention names, you probably know some in the Denver area and whatever. But uh, and so I said to them, I said, I understand you guys uh understand the concept of selling. And they just chuckled and incentives. And I said, Here's the incentive for you. If you sign up your entire sales staff today, I will create one of these little books for you, personally branded for you, that you can give to every single one of your employees to start the program for them. Signed up. That was 105,000 bucks. Wow. Just and and talking to people like people, you know. I could have been awed by the fact of the brain power in that room. But I I I was there because of one of the guys who is one of the brains in that room invited me, and I took that as a being, okay, he thinks I've got something of value to share. So I I built on that and said, How can I help you?

Becoming The Idea Man Through Perspective

SPEAKER_03 16:28

Well, building on that, there's not too many people uh will call themselves the idea man. Bob, the idea man hoo-y. Uh there's got to be a story behind that. And uh obviously we we want to know it.

SPEAKER_00 16:42

Okay. Well, uh it's interesting. I tell people, they talk about branding. Branding has been bantered around for the last years. And what I tell people is branding is not what you call yourself, it's what other people call yourself. And I I became the idea man because clients started calling me that. You know, I'd sit down with them, we'd work in, and I'd be, well, have you ever thought about this? And I found some diplomatic ways of saying, hey, you're stupid, you missed something. You know, here's an idea, maybe you've thought of it already, but you know, just a diplomatic way of saying, blah, blah, blah, blah. I mean, one idea I gave a one of my my clients made him 12 million bucks the first year. So he he liked me and hired me a lot. But uh, you know, and the one guy said, You're a real idea man, aren't you? And a couple of people had said that along the way. So I go, Okay, that I guess that's that's how people look at me. Go sit down, because people say, Why are you the idea manager? Let's talk for a while. And we'll be talking about your challenges, and I'll come up with something and I'll see something maybe that you didn't, because I'm I'm outside here, I got a different perspective, and I may see something that you don't recognize that's an obvious to me. Maybe you do, maybe you don't. So I bring it up, and that's the idea. And you go, holy meck, I never thought of that. Boom. I love it. It's like when I was in the kitchen business. Uh, one of the books I I wrote is on creativity is called Why Didn't I Think of That? I used to get that from my clients a lot of times when I was designing kitchens. They go, Why didn't I think that? And I just go, Well, there's two reasons. One, I've I've got all the training, you know, and two, I need the money. Money might have helped you.

SPEAKER_03 18:23

Oh, that's why I like that.

SPEAKER_00 18:24

And a third thing is you're looking at your kitchen in terms of what's there. Like when I'm doing remodeling, you're looking at what's here. I'm looking at what could be. I'm looking with a bear room, and I'm going, what can I create here? That's the difference in matter of perspective. That's yes.

SPEAKER_03 18:39

And you know, I absolutely love facilitating collaboration sessions. That's I don't know. I don't I some people like to have their superpowers. Uh, I don't know if it's my superpower, it's my super love of life. And I've got a saying that says every idea lead is a bridge to the best idea. And when I apply that to the meeting rooms, and then I start the collaborations with that, realizing that you know every idea is a good idea. And uh you I've seen it so many times where people build from one idea to the next idea, or they even hear a word and it starts another idea. Those didn't happen unless you were in that room creating and facilitating that type of idea creation. Uh, I've spent a lot of time diving into that. And I think you kind of bring that naturally with how you show up, you know, and how you present. And and when you do that, you become I love that you were given the idea of the idea man as well, too. Like, because if you came in, it's like, hey, idea man, got any ideas? Nope. Nope.

SPEAKER_00 19:37

Nope. I tell people sometimes I have no idea, you know. It's like you know, maybe shows it's kind of like the same thing. You know, people go, well, I'm not funny, I don't know any jokes. And let you sit around and start talking about stuff, all of a sudden, oh, I got one. Yeah, you know, that's how it happens. That's like with ideas. If you encourage people to talk, and not all leaders do that, but some leaders are smart, they they put put it out there and then let everybody talk. Yeah, and then they'll they'll they'll seed it and and nurture it a little bit. And well, Bob, tell me a little more about that. George, what what you said this, like just like what you're doing with your podcast here. You're hearing something I say, and you're building on that. Say, Bob, you mentioned this, da-da-da-da. And using that as a breach to something else. And they do that successfully, and the company grows because of that. Yeah.

Lead With Questions To Build Leaders

SPEAKER_03 20:27

It's amazing how and then they'll give, say, the credit to the leader of that meeting. And you're a you're a you're the best leader of that meeting when you said even less. Like you're not, you're just planting seeds out there. They come up with the ideas, and there's a little bit of piecing them all together and guidance in there, and then they're like, Wow, what a great idea! And it was all and I really love, especially when people will have that um collaboration of ideas, because I've done this so much that um I'll go up and say, Hey man, that was a great idea. And they're like, That was yours. Like, I had no idea, like I had no ownership to it, you know, because it I didn't truly have it, wasn't a hundred percent uh my idea, you know, and then you you realize that everybody creates it, there's ownership in there. Uh, you know, there's a book called uh leading with questions. Are you familiar with that? Nope, I'm not the whole idea of a leadership style that involves asking questions. And there's some other I go deeper into just kind of questions studying. I like to lead with questions, and uh by doing that, you um I've had people solve their own problems and give me the credit for it's like, hey, thanks. And all I did was what would you do?

SPEAKER_00 21:41

Uh that's essentially what a good coach does. They help you find the solution, they don't tell you. You know, a mentor might tell you, but a coach is gonna help you discover it.

SPEAKER_03 21:53

Oh, that's a different that's an interesting differentiation of mentoring coach. Yeah, um, because I I tend to not my Micromanage. I want people to have their own ideas, develop their own ideas. And sometimes their ideas aren't the best ideas. But if they own that idea and it's not oh, so back to I'm in construction. So they'll come up. They want me to solve a problem for them. That's what superintendents do, solve problems all day long. And most of the time I was really in this really decision fatigue where you're just you make it like a thousand decisions every single day. I just started asking questions. Hey, we need a problem. There's a scan light that doesn't fit. What would you do? Well, this is what we need to do. Like they they asked me first for an uh an answer. I didn't give one. And then they had the answer and it was sufficient. And so you let them do that. That's just one less decision that I had to make. But the power of that is the ownership that goes to that individual to be able to run with it.

SPEAKER_00 22:49

And the and the next time they're not going to bother you with that question, they're going to deal with it. I'll give you an example when I was district governor, which is what they called it in the old days. Uh, brand new district governor. I I literally went down to TI and visited everybody, which is where I got to know Dan and whatever, and Stan Phil's. And but I had a challenge on something, and I I literally phoned and I talked to Stan Stills. And I said, Stan, here's the thing. He said, Bob, do you have your district manual? I said, Yeah, yeah, yeah. I got that. Because they I don't know if they still do that or not, but they gave you a district manual with paper made of paper, Bob?

SPEAKER_03 23:24

Are you saying this manual was made of paper? It was actually made of paper and they made it.

SPEAKER_00 23:29

They don't do that. They don't do that. Well, in my case, they gave me this manual. And he said, Do you have an yeah, yeah? He said, let's just see if we can find the answer together. And so we're can you find page 67? Yeah, third paragraph down. Would that answer your question? Yeah, that would. He said, and he said, good. Thanks, Bob. Glad to help. Give me a call any time you need. And I thought about it afterwards. He's probably had at that time there were 75 districts. He probably had 75 people like me asking that same stupid question because they didn't read the book. Yeah. Yep. And he was so kind. He was just so kind. And then he didn't say, Bob, you're an idiot. He said, let's see if we can find the answer together. And I learned that. And so I brought that to when I was working with my my area governors and stuff. One of actually, one of them is interesting. It is Pat Pat Johnson, who was one of my area governors. Okay. Yep. I just found out Thursday night. She's coming to our conference here in Eventon, but I'm with you guys in Denver. So that's how that's darn because Pat and I were longtime friends.

SPEAKER_03 24:34

She was a good one. For the listeners, I think it's important. Let's say a little bit about Pat. You know, Pat Johnson definitely has uh inspired, I think, the corporate world and how to take Toastmasters into the corporate world. Uh she's got a brilliant book that she's written for that uh and has made a huge impact in Toastmasters because of her focus on corporate clubs.

SPEAKER_00 24:57

Yeah. But the the interesting thing is uh, and the point I was gonna make was sometimes you can see greatness in people before they even get there. You know, like it didn't surprise me having seen what she did as an area governor that she eventually moved through to be district director and boom, boom, boom, and then eventually international president. Didn't surprise me at all.

SPEAKER_03 25:17

Mm-hmm. So that brings up a really great question too. Like, because you you travel all over the world, you coach people all over the world as well, too. I think one of the secrets of coaching and mentoring is what you just said is uh when people don't even realize how good they are, and they sometimes often don't, even when they hit that those roles. Like, how have you how have you motivated? How have you seen some people? It's like I see something in you. I think that might even be a bad Johnson thing. Uh I see something in you. Uh and and it's really brilliant uh thing because people don't see it in themselves.

Handling Critique And Finding The Truth

SPEAKER_00 25:50

Yeah. Well, and and I think I think that's part of the challenge. There's some there's there's a difference between people who live in their ego, and you you and I both know people like that. But the majority of us don't do that. And we we tend to down sell ourselves. Yeah, we we do, we tend to be in the the imposter syndrome, and you know, I I still fight it after all these years, all these accolades, all the books, all this travel. I still sometimes go, why am I doing this? How come I'm getting the chance to do this? You know, and so I have to remind myself, oh yeah, right, you've earned the right to speak. But people make the difference. Uh I don't know. I I'm trying to put together some stuff for for Saturday morning in terms of sharing some bits and pieces from 35 years. And uh, I remember one of the district directors in in district 21, I think this was very early in my said, Bob, have you been president of your club yet? And I said, No, why? She said, Well, you can't be district director unless you're president of your club. And I went, What? I don't understand. I didn't get that until years later when I was running for for club growth director, and she came up to me and said, Why should I vote for you? I said, Because you started me down this path four years ago. Okay, good, you got my vote. But she saw something I didn't. Yeah, yeah. You know, I just was here to learn to be a better speaker because I had this dream of traveling the world and encouraging people. I didn't think about the leadership component of Telsmath. I not at all. That was never my intention, but she saw something I didn't, you know. And uh so I've done that I've done that for other people. We have a uh a gentleman uh who's he went on to be the the president of of the Canadian Association of Professional Speakers, went on to be the uh international president for the Global Speakers Federation, and he did the forward for my why didn't I think of that? And he mentioned that in the in the forward, if I remember correctly, he said, Bob, you planted the seed, you said to me, someday when you're president because I saw something in him, and I didn't realize that I did it too. Well, you don't realize what you're doing. We have so much impact on people, and nine times out of ten, we have no idea. No idea. We said something that encouraged people, that inspired them, that got them motivated, that made them feel better about their lives, and you don't even know it.

SPEAKER_03 28:19

Yeah, influence, right? You have that's I think the secret power of influence. And you can't, and if you only accredit to the people who give you good feedback, um, then you're not getting you're getting one-tenth of that feedback based on uh others, you know, their their other impressions. Like I've I've given this advice to a couple of different uh district directors and future district directors because you end up in that role. It's such a great uh leadership development for any job that you're ever going to do because you're gonna do it in a volunteer organization, to donate your time, and then you put up with some of the crabbiest people in the world, uh, which is why you're laughing because you know there's like the one percent or half percent are the are the squeaky wheels. And in reality, you have to, and I had to do this because I I was at a point where like this is frustrating as a leader. You know, I'm donating my time, I'm getting this, uh, you know, all I'm getting all these complaints. But in reality, there were a thousand people. I mean, that's probably an accurate number of who were really super happy about my leadership. And there's one or two people who just were the constant squeaky wheel. That applies to life as well, too. You're not gonna hear all the good stuff. And being able to have the the skin to be able to uh to take that is something that really the thick skin, I guess, develops that leadership uh muscle. Like I bet you've had um, I bet you've had some uh rough evaluations in your life.

SPEAKER_00 29:47

Oh, yes. I I actually gonna share one of them on on Saturday when when I was working on the accredited speaker program, it was it was a long-term goal. Uh there was seven of us that got together, we made the commitment we were gonna go for it, and every month we'd get together and try bits and pieces of speeches. And our commitment to each other was no fluff. No fluff. If you were good, you were good. If you weren't, you weren't. And I I tried this one little bit, and Judy Johnson, who was one of the one of the people, came up to me afterwards. She said, Bob, would you like some advice? Yeah. She said, Here's here's the deal. To make that speech that little bit you do better, take your beginning and put it closer to the end. Like, huh? And then I got it. Like, that fucked, man, that sucked. But that was her. And I loved her for it because that was the commitment. I thought I was doing something really good. And it but that's the point, you know. You yeah, I think the other thing that's tough to learn is evaluations are simply people's opinion. And they're entitled to their opinion, they're not entitled to live in your head. And I one thing I've I've suggested to people who uh get into professional speaking are don't don't look at your your your warm fuzzy sheets after right immediately after you speak. You know, that's the tendency because you used to do these these valuation things. Don't look at that first thing. Give it two or three days so you process how you think you did, then you're right in the right format to look at it and go, this person loved me, this person hated me. Because otherwise you look at it and go, how come this person hated me? Because some people, the better you are, the more they're gonna hate you. It's just that simple. Or they're having a bad day and they're taking it out on you. Or they have a legitimate point. When you did this, it didn't work. Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 31:46

It didn't work for them, right? And that I think that would if I I mean I became a bit of a feedback junkie. And when I start, uh, you know, I almost don't like the hey, good jobs, because those don't benefit me. Uh, I like I do like it, you know. The that night we all do. I mean, that's why we we do this, right? We enjoy the accolades, we enjoyed the pat on the back. Good job. I enjoyed it, but truly I'm also a feedback junkie to where I want to continuously improve. And a lot of times, the their you know, evaluations can be a little soft, and then you have the one that's just out in left field, and you're like, they don't totally didn't get it. I actually I used to, I mean, nobody really likes those originally. I like them now because there is a seed of truth in this, and Jonko Wilnick talked a little bit about this too. Is if somebody says something, there's a there's a little seed of truth in there, and he's like, Good, you know, that that's kind of his response to it, because you take that little bit of a seed. Why did they see it that way? There's got to be a little bit of truth, because if you don't, that's your ego talking, right? Yeah, because you you want to have that uh the that perception of yourself. Yeah, those are great too.

Connect With People Before You Speak

SPEAKER_00 32:55

The other thing is if you don't, you miss that percentage of the audience that thinks like that. Yep. Because one of the reasons that I I enjoy, I don't enjoy it if it's if it's a negative kind of evaluation. I don't know. Oh yeah, bring it on, it's fun. But if you process it and think about it, or you talk to them and say, tell me why you thought like that, then you grow. Because they they they're sharing your opinion from whatever reason, but I get better because of that. Yeah, and you know, it's just that allows me to think because we want to do a good job for our audiences. Yeah, we do. I mean, as you asked earlier about getting prepped. You know, I talk to people before I get there, I talk to people when I get there. Um you know, like I I did a I did a program for OKTire. It's a big uh national uh tire dealer here in Canada, and they they they they enticed me to come speak in Cancun in in January or February, you know, living in in this weather, going someplace warm. And yeah, okay. I charge them full fee, but I would have given up a discount if they wanted. I'll do it for free. Well, no, I don't know it for free, but I wouldn't give my discount, but they paid me full. And and the funny part was that they did a uh they had another speaker coming in to speak to the French dealers, and I I I knew him because we were in caps together, so I was back and forth. And the lady said, You've been so helpful in terms of working with Patrick. Can can we give you a couple more days in Cancun?

unknown 34:24

Yeah, sure.

SPEAKER_00 34:26

But it's interesting when we got there, they had 300 dealers and they had a receiving line. You know, they had the president of the company, and I literally just stood at the end of the receiving line and I shook hands with every single person that went through the line. Hi, I'm Bob Huyo speaking tomorrow. I already knew some of them before they walked into my two-hour program. Yeah, and that was just it it's it's not a matter of just getting up and pontificating, it's trying to connect with people because if you connect, you build a bridge, then then you can have a conversation. Yeah, even if it's from the stage, you can have a conversation, and maybe that builds a conversation that happens off stage afterwards. And that that can be just as valuable.

SPEAKER_03 35:10

There's so many valuable tips in being, you know, standing in front of an audience that works one-on-one, what works on in even just general communication. Because just what you said about that connecting with people early on, uh, and I know you, and I've seen you speak. Like when you're speaking to an audience, you make that uh eye contact with one person and you're connecting with 10 people. I mean, there's some kind of weird, uh, I don't know, they probably is going to use the word quantum in there somewhere. Uh there's something at the quantum level that happens when you connect with one person that it affects, you know, 10 to 15 around them, depending on the audience. And to be able to do that and make connections are some of the you know things that you can do from a stage of 300 to a thousand, um, making a connection with the audience uh is is something you want to do on a one-on-one basis as well. It all fits, it all ties together.

SPEAKER_00 36:02

It's it's very similar when you're when you're having a one-on-one conversation. You're you're basically focusing on them and and having this back and forth and making that count. You can take some of that to the stage too, like you just said. And it it's the same mentality of saying, I'm talking with people, not to people. And that's the difference with those two words makes a difference in what you do. I'm talking with people, not to people.

Turning Toastmasters Skills Into Income

SPEAKER_03 36:29

Yeah, yeah, it's a total twist that it's the opposite of what people think, and you can see the people that have failed doing it because they just get they and maybe they're charismatic enough to carry it, but nobody remembers, right? They they might not ever remember what they spoke about, they might have had a little bit of fun with it, but to actually connect and make an impact. It goes back to your, you know, what you were talking about of of serving the the audience. You know, you're not there just to be Bob Hoey on the stage, you're there to truly give and serve. That makes such such a difference. Let's uh pivot a little bit. I know you've got an event coming up and you've been working on a book uh with somebody. Let's talk a little bit about that and then we can kind of go into some wrap-up uh after that. What do you got? What are you cooking?

SPEAKER_00 37:12

Well, uh Marty Dickinson, who some of you may know in that area, he's uh a member of a couple of Toastmaster clubs. He's also the membership member for um the Colorado chapter of NSA. And I are doing a program on on Sunday morning called Skills Pay. The concept is we already do a lot of things in Toastmasters. We learn a lot of things in Toastmasters that we can take into the real world and and make money on, whether it's a a new job, a new business, uh uh a new new something that we create, you know, writing a book, becoming a speaker, you know, all those kinds of things. So we we sat down and brainstormed, and this is the fun part of when you get somebody who's creative, uh, who's creative like you are. We we we we ended up with about 239 things you could be doing with just stuff you've done as a toastmaster. As an area director, you learn how to do certain things. Here's where you kind of leverage that. Yeah. So now we got to bring that down, and that's what we're working on on the book and on the program. Actually, Marty and I are gonna get together today at 11 to spend some time on the program part to try and bring that into something we can do in two hours and give you some solid value when you walk away Sunday morning. But uh, it's just it's an interesting concept of saying there's so many people in Toastmasters that have uh used what they've learned in Toastmasters to, like in my case, I'll get you know, I came to Toastmasters 35 years ago this month with an idea that I wanted to travel the world. My icebreaker was essentially that I wanted to travel a girl, I wanted to make a difference, I wanted to encourage people. I said that 35 years ago. Wow. And and I've been doing it. You know, by the time I get to Denver, I'll be 86 countries, and I will have spoken and presented in 33 of them in person and about another dozen online. But sometimes that's a matter of stating it and then making it happen. But yeah, uh so we're we're gonna we're gonna give you some t-shirts, we're gonna give you some uh some tips, we're gonna make you think a little bit, we're gonna challenge you. We're we're working on uh on an ebook, and Marty being Marty said, well, if I can get it done time, maybe I'll get a few printed. Well, let's let's see, buddy, let's get it written first because we gotta bring it down to something manageable. It's like this two-hour thing was actually probably about four hours, and now we're bringing it down. Yeah, we've only got two hours with you, and that's something I've learned in in my life. And that's one of the reasons I started writing books, because I can't give you everything I can give you in 45 minutes. Right. That's a typical keynote. But I can give you more of what I do in one of my books. And if you like me, you'll buy a book and take it home. And that's that's where I mean, people used to come up when I first started speaking. Do you have a book? No, no, no, no, no. Why? And then if you change the and answer the question, why would you buy one? Yeah, if you had one, I'd buy one. Oh, okay. So I started with a little spiral-bound book and uh and and started selling. I had four of them, and then then eventually with with with the online book things that became bigger, and now there's 30 of them out there. Oh, wow, wow, congratulations. That's a lot. So almost every single program has a book attached to it.

SPEAKER_03 40:31

Okay.

SPEAKER_00 40:32

And that just took time, but it makes what I do more valuable because if they want that, I have some clients that actually will pre-buy the book to give everybody in the audience. Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 40:44

Yeah, I think there's a lot of value to that, even outside of the uh ebooks that are so popular. Uh I don't buy a lot of books. I do a lot of uh books on tape myself, but I find myself buying books recently uh and having them. Uh I'm interviewing somebody in a couple of weeks where I bought their book because I wanted to uh go through because it's a new concept for me. Uh so I'm physically going through that so we can uh you know really understand their content. But I think there's an anticipation that people are gonna get a book uh at this event. So uh they're gonna get the ebook.

SPEAKER_00 41:17

They're gonna get an e version for sure. Okay, but then they get a print version. Yeah, I'm leaving that to Marty. We got to get the e version done first because part of it's like, okay, that's good, that's a good idea. And I'm I'm the guy who surprising myself being practical, okay. Ring that in. Let's we get what we get. You have to be the ringing in guy. Just to remind you, I'm leaving for for Milan on April 15th. So anything I'm gonna do has to be done by the 14th. I mean, I'm gonna have my stuff packed to come to Denver on the 14th because I come home, I get home about midnight on the 29th. I'm leaving for the airport at three o'clock in the morning on the first because I got a six o'clock, six a.m. flight to Denver. So I'm not gonna be thinking, I'll be tired. I'm I'm thinking it out before I go. So I just come home, unpack, repack, get some sleep, go to the airport.

Where To Find Bob And Takeaway

SPEAKER_03 42:09

Well, and this will be a couple weeks before this episode comes out, and by then, hopefully, I'll have a link to your book, or at least I'll have definitely any link to uh anything that you have. I guess let's uh in kind of closing up, I've got a couple other questions, but how do people get a hold of you? What's the best way to get a hold of Bob?

SPEAKER_00 42:26

The best way is my my main website is ideaman.net. And you can put that probably at the end when you're doing this. And uh or they can just send me an email at BobHui, you know, behue at mcsnet.ca.

SPEAKER_03 42:43

And are you also on LinkedIn? Yes, I am. So uh kind of a couple questions uh left. One is what what is one thing that people get wrong about Bob the idea, manhue?

SPEAKER_00 42:59

I think I think they think I'm an extrovert because of what I do. I really do. And and in a lot of ways I am. My wife and I are are polar opposites. She's definitely an introvert, and that she's really good when she has to do stuff. But I'm okay backing off. I I don't always have to be on stage. I don't always have to be the person in front. I learned that when I was in leadership. I I definitely learned that in terms of doing that. Like I told Marty when we're blocking out stuff we're spending on. I said, I don't mind if you do more of this because I I'm certainly having lots of time to speak on Saturday. I'm doing a keynote at lunch, I'm doing something else in the evening. And you know, so I'm okay with being the with bomb who you think. That's totally fine with me. And uh let you shine, and I'll be there to help help put the spotlight. Hey, look at Marty, you know. And but uh I think that I I enjoy life. Uh and when I'm on stage, I tell people uh it's like my friend Darren LaCroix talks about stage time. You know, that's his thing. Mine is. Played. When I'm on stage, I play. I do my work before I walk on stage. And then when I'm on stage, I just play. I play with the audience, I play with ideas. And if if at the end of my presentation, I either have one of two things happen. I'm either totally spent or totally buzzed because the audience has responded. But I'm okay with being quiet and just sitting down and talking to people one-on-one. Yeah. You know, like one thing that's supposedly happening, and Isaac is unique. She said, Kim said, Do you mind if we we have people sign up and pay money to spend uh sit at your table Saturday night now? Hey, if you have people want to spend money to sit with me, I'm cool with that if they'll raise money for you. I just hope the table is there's nobody at the table, I'm in trouble, you know.

SPEAKER_03 44:47

That's what we've done that before, and that is the fear. Uh just for the for the listeners, when we have uh speakers come in, we had world champions, you know, sit with a world champion, sit with an accredited speaker. And so we were able to sell a seat, you know, at one of the dinners with it, and we're doing that for you as well, too. Uh but that was kind of always that fear, I think. What if nobody shows up? Nobody, it's like, no, what if we so it's all right? There's some fun set aside to uh pay some people to go ahead and sit with you. Well, and then the last thing I like to do on the podcast is you know, we've spent 45 minutes or so chatting with each other. Uh, I know this as a speaker, I know this as a listener. Like, oftentimes I'm gonna walk away with one thing, and that's kind of even that is uh a challenge, I challenge audiences to walk away with one thing as as opposed to nothing and just a feeling. But what's what's one takeaway that the listeners here on the Uncommon Communicator could walk away with as part of our conversation today?

SPEAKER_00 45:42

Well, I'm gonna I'm gonna mention something and it it it teas in a little bit with my keynote. That when we share our stories and we share connections together, it makes it it enriches our lives individually. And I think that's the process of what I what I get out of Toastmasters is about the people. When when we share time together, when we share stories, challenges, celebrations, uh dreams, those kinds of things, we get better. We bet we have better connections, we get more support, we we move further. Like somebody said, if you want to get there fast, go by yourself. If you want to be there effectively, go as a team. And when you create your team by engaging people around you, everybody wins. I guess they just do. You know, I I've just seen that so much in the last 35 years that it's almost become second nature now. Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 46:43

Well, Bob, this has been an absolute pleasure having a conversation with you. I think there's some golden nuggets in there that uh the listeners will draw out. And with that, uh, we'll say to the audience, see you bye. All right, bye-bye now. Congratulations. You made it all the way to the end. You're officially a one percenter. Thanks for tuning in to this episode of the Uncommon Communicator with me, your host, James Gable. Make sure you like and share this episode. This helps spread the message of communication to the world. Check out our website, the Uncommon Communicator, for more and connect with me on LinkedIn to keep building those communication skills. See you next time.